Seriously, I hit an all time low this morning.
I locked myself in my closet!
I wanted to cry, although I knew I didn’t have time too because it was 7:30 and I wasn’t dressed and needed to leave my house to get to work on time… so I just stood there taking deep breaths and counting to 10. When I came out, the Captain had removed his pants (he doesn’t particularly care for pants..), put under ware over his pull-ups and put his rain boots on. This all after I wrestled him to the ground and forced pants and a clean shirt on him. You would think I was force feeding something nasty to him all the while flailing about, screaming NO PANTS..
oh the horror .. PANTS!
So what do you do? The Hubs and I are constantly reminding each other to pick our battles. Today, I picked it – and I’m not sure that I won. Shouldn’t moms win.. I mean, he went to school with pants on .. but no coat – bc he refused, no socks, and his cape. I am at a total loss with my little monster right now. He’s extremely stubborn (so is his dad.. I am not at all… wink wink) and hard headed.. but the sweetest little monkey ever.
I googled “Raising a toddler is hard.” It’s what I was feeling, and wondered if anyone else felt this way – all the while, knowing EVERY parent feels this at some point. I read this article on Parenting.com called Reality Check: Raising a Difficult Toddler - she makes some really good points:
- there is nothing funny about the mix of worry, anger, guilt, and frustration you feel as the parent of a difficult child. (But I ask.. Is the Captain truely a difficult child? Who measures that?)
- You must realize that he is not doing it to you (Yes, I think I said today – I do everything for him and sacrifice for anything he needs or wants.. and he doesn’t listen, and doesn’t respect.. oh yeah, he’s 2)
- He is not out to get you (I’m not sure about this one..I think he’s working on something with the dog)
- Step one is to accept that, for better and worse, this is just your son’s personality, steps two and three are to notice which situations set him off (sensory overload, transitions, not being asked what he wants to do) and teach him how to manage his own intensity (by getting lots of exercise, having quiet book times, being given choices).
It all boils down to wanting to do the right thing, wanting the Captain to turn out to be a good person, who loves and lives and has many friends.. who loves his parents and siblings (god willing) and DOES NOT TURN OUT TO BE A SERIAL KILLER. So if there is some magical math problem that can ensure that.. could someone PLEASE clue me in?
Sometimes, I have to go to one of my happy places…
Oak Park Mall! Boo Yeah!
Love these fools
The beach early in the morning
This is Mindy Clarke, and I approve this message!
Mindy~ I just read your blog. Have you read love and logic? I reminds me of the part where it says is he being asked what he wants to do? Although in the end this is your decision, I live and die by giving carsen options, always winning for me in the end. As small as snack time up to which princess she wants to see in disneyworld. Anyway, Just thinking about you and this topic.
we do that to a point, and maybe i need to start doing it more. Our pediatrician actually gave us this tip – and it works once he realizes it’s not going to work out exactly the way he wants.. he will cave and pick one of my options.. but its not always that easy
Hi Mindy…I’m following you from SITS Girls. #4 Sounds good…giving them choices always worked out best for me.
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