What’s new in your world?

My life has been on a crazy train lately.

Since January:

  • I turned 34 (eek)
  • Celebrated the Captains 3rd Birthday
  • My 6th wedding anniversary
  • The Hubs 37th Birthday
  • Signed the Captain up for organized sports
  • Realized that he  is still too young for organized sports
  • Joined a great gym, one that I actually really, REALLY, like going too.
  • Had some realizations about my professional life
  • Talked an amazing lady into launching a design business with me
  • Made a few mistakes
  • And finally, have the Captain almost totally potty trained (betcha I jixed us!)

I’ve been busy. I FEEL like I’ve been busy.. but in that good, workout kind of feel.

First and foremost I can’t believe my baby is 3! He’s sassy, smart, feisty, so smart and so very very frustrating. People keep saying, “It doesn’t really get better until about age 5.” This scares the crap out of me.. Are you kidding – don’t tell a mom who’s at the beginning of the 3’s that it could last 2 more years!

I will be writing more on this subject later, but I have had some pretty major realizations about my professional life. i have come to the conclusion that 20 is too young to be able to make decisions that will impact you when you are “old,” and “mature”. Wait! Am I those things? Old and Mature.. well I’m older and more mature, at least.

At 34 – looking back with regret will not help me move forward. So how do I move forward? (seriously, if you know – could you please tell me – i’m asking for realz..) I’m kidding, I think….

So, I’m at an impasse.

I have this crazy amount of guilt about not being with the Captain more. He may or may not be a little on the wild and crazy side, and I wonder if I was at home with him, if I would be able to help reallocate some of that energy into something more positive. I also, really don’t want to quit working. I really like having a job, and being able to financially contribute to our family. Because lord knows, I have done my fair share of spending.

All roads not taken are scary.

The thought of leaving a company to go out on my own, is scary. I can’t fail. I don’t have the luxury of it not working. I’d put the Hubs and the Captain in harm’s way, at least financially, and that can’t happen. So I am taking baby steps.. I mean, I have dreamed of doing something on my own since I was 16.. so apparently, I take very very slow steps!

The next few months should be interesting. I will do better at updating this – and I hope people are still reading.

xoxo
m

 

 

 

 

There have been some questions as to if I am quitting my job. No, I have not, and don’t really plan to yet. I don’t want to mess up our lifestyle at all.. so I’m here giving my all until I can honestly look and say I have enough business on my own to sustain our life. I have a good thing here, nice people, good work, the opportunity to learn new skills. But don’t worry, YOU WILL ALL KNOW when/if I quit my job! 

Oh, the places I’ve been..

For some reason, I have always prided myself on the fact that I can tell you ANYTHING about the great city of Kansas City (and really.. neighboring cities).. I am not kidding – where to eat, where to shop, where to stay, where to happy hour, where to poop.. well.. maybe not that one.  But still. I am a vast resource of pretty useless knowledge.. and I kind of love it. It’s one of those quirks that I am pretty sure The Hubs loves and hates about me all at the same time. The look on his face when people talk about a restaurant that, ” I JUST LOVE,” especially if he’s never been there.. always kind of amuses me. I’d like to think he’s in awe of my useless information, but I think more times than not.. it kind of annoys him… especially when I can’t tell him important dates or amounts of checks..

Just one of those things that keeps our marriage so spicy!

I’d really like to pull my resources together, and do something with my knowledge… and it doesn’t stop at the Kansas City metro area (although that’s what I know best and love the mostest) .. Any place I’ve been and love (and hate), I have made a mental note – and can tell someone, no, WANT to tell you about my experiences. I’m not sure where to start, or how to get started. Do I start a blog, write some articles, start a tour company (boo.)? I’m just not sure. This currently haunts my dreams at night, a desire to be more creative in my day and do something that I love, not just like, or am fine with. Something that fulfills a need and desire that is not currently being met. I am creative person, I design, I write (or try to write), I take pictures, I cook. I love doing things with the Captain that will spark excitement and creativity within him.

Is it fear, again, that is holding me back? I am just not sure.

Don’t forget that this week is KC Restaurant week! This is such a great way to try out restaurants you have always wanted to try, or go back and visit a favorite. $15 lunches and $30 dinners – most are 2, 3 or 4 course meals – and samples the restaurants best dishes. This week, I’d like to try just a couple, I think I did something like 4 lunches and 2 dinners last year – which got pretty pricey!

Do you have funny quirks that you love about yourself? Favorite restaurants or any you want to try? Let us know!

xoxo,

m

December came and went.. where was I?

Probably on the couch watching the series finale of Gossip Girl (Dan? What the..)

Noo.. well.. yes, but no. Our month was so crazy – I am afraid I haven’t gotten all my Christmas cards out! I def didn’t write on my blog, I’m pretty sure that I forgot to get someone something annnnd then it was Christmas! I mean holy cow! We had birthday parties, and dinners out with friends, we had a family funeral for a wonderful lady who lived 101 years and who was loved by literally hundreds if not thousands of people in Kansas City, St. Joseph and Plattsburg and then Christmas and New Years. WHOA. I am wiped!

I have had some time to reflect on my year. I feel like I got into a habit of making declarations; I WILL LOSE WEIGHT, I WILL EAT HEALTHIER, I WILL BE ORGANIZED… and then, although not always realizing it, followed that up with… tomorrow. How lazy is that??  It’s all about fear. I fear I will fail or disappoint, and so instead I drink soda (yum), and sit around, and watch TV. I don’t want to be sad and frustrated with my self, my weight or my laziness anymore! I want to be happy and thankful and moving.

So, TODAY needs to be my word for 2013! I need to stop dwelling on the rough patches from the past, and look forward. We all need to do that. Everyone I know has something in there past that they are caught up on – something that keeps them from fully moving forward. Do you know what yours is?

This year, I would like to start a food blog. A blog about restaurants, near and far.. and food I love or don’t, cooking, cookbooks – anything food. And do you know why I haven’t started it.. Because I can’t come up with a name.. how ridiculous is that?

Fear again!
Are you seeing a pattern, I sure am!

I would also like to get back into photography. I miss taking my camera EVERYWHERE! I miss the process of shooting and processing. Although I would love to get a new camera, I have a nice Nikon 35mm that I think I will make an effort to play with more. Ideally I could find a photographer in the area that needs some help at shoots or in the studio – just so I can be around it. I would absolutely love that.

As I type this I realize that my hope is that 2013 will be a transformation year. I’d really like to take that budget bull by the proverbial horns and get it under control, I have to lose weight and clearly my creative side is screaming at me to do something.

I hope you come along for the ride, I can’t promise that I will complete everything on my want list – but I will do my best – and promise, if nothing else, as an outsider – you will be amused!

Happy New Years! Love you all for reading.

xoxo

m